all i owe

Compared to the last post, I'm in a whole new world.
Unexpected things happened today.
1. I truly thought my work schedule was 12.30pm - 9pm, but when I got to work I found out that I ended work at 5.45pm. It was a miracle.
2. I tried to do the pieces of fruit for ceramics homework, but when I got to the studio, there was no clay left. This is hard because the homework is due tomorrow morning and tonight was the first chance I had to get to it, and now it can't be done. It's also good because I need to learn to embrace failure, and I am going to fail this assignment because it's impossible to make clay fruit without clay.
3. I talked to Lizzie, an amazingly talented young lady I met in the ceramics studio while I didn't make clay fruit. We talked about a lot of things, and I feel honored to have made her acquaintance.
4. Today was the first day in the past three or four weeks that I haven't felt overwhelmingly nauseous every minute of the day.

So, I still have to do my paper for film class, and I failed at doing half of my ceramics homework, but I felt better today and talked for nearly an hour with a new friend.
Here's the question of the day/week/life: Where/in whom do you place your treasure?
I've got to stop being consumed with myself and my nausea, and start being consumed with how amazing God is, and being consumed with communicating with him, and giving my worries up to him.

Scott and I are doing well, right now the house is a mess and there's not enough food, but soon our week will slow (I hope!) and I'll do some dishes and we'll get to the grocery store.
Today I had this outburst about getting a present for Valentine's Day. I'm a spoiled brat who thinks I need a present, because I didn't get one for my birthday, and because I like presents. Who doesn't? Anyway, it was probably uncalled for, but it felt good, because sometimes I am unwilling to tell Scott what is important to me. I think that with a present, what is important is that it's an object that someone gives you because they have thought of you, and decided on something that you would enjoy. I would like something small, and sweet. Nothing practical, because I always want practical things for Christmas.
I'm contemplating returning the climbing shoes for good, and getting a store credit or something. I feel like a fraud. I haven't climbed in a long time, and I'm not sure when I'll be able to or want to again. Besides, if anyone deserves a present around here, it's Scott. Maybe he could use the store credit for something he wants.

In other news, I love these ceramics artists: Kaori Tatebayashi, Karen Swyler, Justin Novak, Gabriele Koch, and Carina Ciscato. It helps to look at their work because one day hopefully I'll be making work that I want to make, instead of a 26 inch cylinder or hollow clay fruit, which are just assignments that are hard to find time for. Unless I work with porcelain, the ascetic that I long for will be impossible.
And I still want to resume massage therapy. Maybe it's more important than an undergraduate degree, I haven't decided yet.

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